According to Pat Robertson we all have the power to raise the dead, but we're simply not using it. Wait, what?

"Well he gave his disciples authority to heal the sick, to raise the dead. I mean that was part of our power. You see ladies and gentlemen God is almighty, he is A-L-MIGHTY, and he gives us that power and Jesus said 'you say to the mountain. you speak to the dead person.' He called on Lazarus. he said 'Lazarus come forth' and the dead man came up out of the ground. We have the same power. he's given it to us, it's in the holy spirit. But we need to be in touch with him. We need to behold him. We need to be submitted to him. That power's there we're just not using it."

Well this changes my afternoon plans completely.

Here I was planning to go to the movies with my daughter, but screw that!

There is a dead dog in the woods just off the road and by God I am going to go on over there and raise that puppy from the dead.  And then I am going to start my new life as a faith healer and zombie maker.

I can hardly wait!

Boy I wonder if I could raise Sarah Palin's career from the dead?

Nah, that is too miraculous even for God.

Pat Robertson claims that thanks to the Supreme Court the "onslaught of homosexual behavior" is having "deadly consequences."

Courtesy of Raw Story:  

“This onslaught of homosexual behavior that is being forced on us by the Supreme Court of the United States is having deadly consequences,” Robertson announced on the Monday edition of The 700 Club. “I was afraid it was going to happen. It has happened now in Idaho.” 

“If I were that couple, I’d get ahead of the curve. I’d get on an airplane and leave Idaho or get in your car and drive across the border into Montana,” the TV preacher recommended. “Get out of that state. And if need be, close your chapel down. I mean, just get out ahead of it because this is outrageous.”

You know I am not sure that Robertson clearly understand just how far progress has spread on this issue. Currently there are 31 states where same sex marriage is legal, and only 19 that are still fighting the inevitable.

 That does not leave a whole lot of places that you can drive to from Idaho where these people can get away from "teh gays."

By the way does anybody have a body count as to how many people have been killed thus far by this "deadly" increase in same sex marriage?