The Interview is coming to Alaska!


Courtesy of Alaska Dispatch:

In the wake of controversy surrounding "The Interview," a comedy about the assassination of North Korea's leader Kim Jong Un starring Seth Rogen and James Franco, the Bear Tooth Theatrepub in Anchorage has announced it will begin screening the film Jan. 2. 

The independent, second-run theater will not publicize show times for the film until Monday evening, according to Rand Thornsley, film buyer for the Bear Tooth. Tickets will go on sale the following day, he said. 

“This was the only opportunity for (Sony Pictures) to have an opening in Anchorage theatrically, so they are allowing the Bear Tooth to run the film within our normal programming,” Thornsley said. 

Thornsley said he confirmed Tuesday evening that “The Interview” would play on the Bear Tooth's single screen. 

He said theater managers expected to arrange “extra security measures” for its showings, though he did not have specifics. 

“Since we don’t have the issue with having a multiplex, we will only be running ‘The Interview’ at one particular time,” Thornsley said. “That makes it a little bit easier. People can make their choice, whether or not they want to see it. It won’t be hurting other films.”

Somehow I doubt that Alaskans will be terribly intimidated by any threats from hackers or North Koreans. 

After all we survived Sarah Palin. What could Kim Jong Un do to us that was worse than that?

By the way the movie might also be coming to Netflix a few days after Christmas and that is most likely how I will end up watching it. 


Merry Christmas everybody!


To all my IM friends, here is wishing you the all time best Christmas day imaginable.

And in honor of Bishop Shrewsbury, who hates John Lennon, here is your Christmas song of the day.

Let us hope that we all live to see a day when there is no more war, no more hatred, and no more reason not to love everybody on this planet as if they were your brother or your sister.

Because you know what, they are. 


President Obama brought an early Christmas present for the Democrats, and the rest of the country.


Courtesy of The Hill:  

Democrats on Tuesday received a gift high on their wish list — an invigorated economy that they believe will give President Obama much-needed clout when he faces off with a Republican Congress next year. 

Current and former Obama aides say they expect the White House to get a year-end boost from the 5 percent expansion rate of the economy in the third quarter, and expect the president to aggressively talk up the gains in the months to come. 

The growth figures also could give the White House new leverage as it seeks common ground with Republicans on a range of policy areas, such as trade and taxes, and as it prepares for battle in others, like changing the healthcare law. 

"The proof is in the pudding," one former senior Obama administration official said. "There's really nothing else to say."

Yeah there really is nothing left to say is there?

It seems the minute that the polls closed on November 4th, and before the Republicans could even uncork their champagne bottles to celebrate what they thought was a victory, the President was already opening the can of whoopass that he was planning to present them with for the next two years.

God I love the holidays, don't you?


Sarah Palin literally calls in her appearance on Todd Starnes big Fox News hyper Christian, military loving, Ronald Reagan corpse masturbating, Christmas special.


Okay so the other day I was poking fun at the Pillsbury dough boy here and his upcoming Christmas special, and I described his lineup as follows: 

As you can see the program features a who's who from the "I have never heard of these people" list. And of course Sarah Palin, who is only a handful of years away from being added to that list.

So as all of you know I just say stuff. I really don't think that anybody is paying attention most of the time.

Especially the person who is the subject of my posts.

But this time I may have been wrong about that. Because as it turned out Palin herself may not have wanted to be included on a list of "I have never heard of these people."

So instead of flying out to the Fox News studio, Palin simply phoned it in. Literally.

Here is how Wonkette covered it:

Sarah Palin, phoning it in from Wasilla, Up-There-In-Alaska. Because Jesus might be the reason for the season, but he’s not reason enough to hop a plane to show up in person. 

The other reason for the season, besides Jesus, is a reminder to buy Sarah Palin’s book about the “War on Christmas,” which apparently was inspired by none other than Todd Starnes and his coverage of those who would “take Christ out of Christmas” — by failing to buy Sarah’s book, we assume. (Wonkette also has the video.)

So to be clear not only did Palin NOT show up in person for the "special," but she also took up valuable airtime hawking last year's ghostwritten Christmas book that nobody bothered to buy in 2013.

Now I have to admit that I don't watch Christmas specials anymore, but my memory of them were that they had actual people who showed in person up to perform, like the Mandrell Sisters, Jose Feliciano, Johnny Mathis, Mariah Carey, and so on. All dressed up in suits and beautiful gowns to entertain the audience.

I simply cannot think of a single incident where a guest simply phoned in their appearance so that they could stay home in their pajamas and drink instead.  Can you?

I think that indicates just how little Palin thought of Todd Starnes and his "Christmas special" jam packed with people nobody had every even fucking heard of.

And trust me, if you cannot even get Sarah Palin to show up at your event you have really sunk to a new low. That woman once showed up at a bowling alley trade show for fuck's sake, and yet she would not show up for this.

Damn, that's gotta hurt!


Congressman Michael Grimm does not believe that pleading guilty to a felony is any reason to lose his job.


"What do you mean what an I doing here today? I work here."
Courtesy of The Washington Times:  

Rep. Michael G. Grimm, New York Republican, said Tuesday he does not plan to resign his seat after pleading guilty to one felony tax charge tied to activities involving a restaurant he co-owned prior to winning election to Congress in 2010. 

Grimm pleaded guilty to helping prepare a false tax return, a charge stemming from a 20-count indictment against the congressman handed up in April. The former FBI agent faces up to three years in prison and is scheduled to be sentenced June 8. 

The indictment accused Grimm of understating gross receipts and employee wages at a health restaurant he had co-owned by more than $1 million. 

After his court appearance, Grimm apologized for his actions and said what he did was wrong but said he does not plan to step down. 

“I’m going to get back to work and work as hard as I can,” he said. 

No you're not. You don't get to do that.  Does he?

Well apparently so far nobody is locking him out of his office or dragging him off the floor of Congress in handcuffs, so I guess he can.

I mean sure the Democrats are pitching a fit and calling for Boehner to give this criminal the heave ho, but who listens to them anymore?

And don't forget that this is the same asshole who threatened to break a reporter in half and throw him off a balcony.

If you want to watch a brilliant take on this Rachel Maddow has that very thing for you.


MSNBC presents the 9 most Sarah Palin being Sarah Palin moments.


MSNBC's Anna Brand has compiled a list of incidents in 2014 of Sarah Palin essentially being the most Sarah Palin.

And they are as follows:  

1. The time she decided Putin wrestles bears and Obama wears mom jeans. 

Sound bite: “People are looking at Putin as one who wrestles bears and drills for oil. They look at our president as one who wears mom jeans,” Palin said “Anyone who carries the commonsense gene would know that Putin doesn’t change his stripes,” she said. “He wants to exert huge power and dominance, so he has to get to those border areas and he has to capture them.”


2. The time she sort of quoted Dr. Seuss.

This of course was several months after Ted Cruz read from "Green Eggs and Ham" during his ridiculous and self serving filibuster.  In March Palin did the same in front of CPAC:  

Sound bite: “I do not like this Uncle Sam. I do not like his health care scam. I do not like these dirty crooks, or how they lie and cook the books. I do not like when Congress steals, I do not like their crony deals,” she continued. “I do not like this spying man. I do not like ‘oh yes we can.’ I do not like this spending spree. We’re smart, we know there’s nothing free. I do not like reporters’ smug replies when I complain about their lies. I do not like this kind of hope, and we won’t take it, nope, nope, nope.”

3. The time she said being a grandma might turn Hillary Clinton conservative. 

Sound bite: “I think anyone who is a grandparent really starts looking further down the road. We start thinking about things like $17 trillion dollar debt that our nation is under and what we’re going to hand that to our grandkids for them to pay off,” she said. “That’s not fair to our grandkids. Hopefully, she’ll start thinking along those terms, too.” 

4. The time she thought drinking Diet Dr. Pepper was the Ice Bucket Challenge. 

Sound bite: “C’mon, at this stage of my life, in my career, aren’t I a little too prim and proper for all that ice bucket water dumping?”

"Prim and proper?" Hardly.
5. The time she said let’s all bless the haters.

Sound bite: “Hey, the more they’re pouring it on, the more I’m going to bug the crap out of them by being out there, with a voice, with the message, Hopefully running for office in the future too … Bless their hearts, those haters out there. They don’t understand that it invigorates me. It wants me to get out there and defend the innocent,” she said. “It makes me want to work so hard for justice in this country!” 

6. The time her family got into a bloody, shirtless drunken brawl. 

Sound bite: No sound bite. No one reportedly listened to her when she tried to intervene in Bristol’s defense and was sitting safely inside her white stretch limo when police arrived, according to the report. 

Okay well clearly this Anna Brand did not do her research. Because as all of us already know, and the link above proves, Palin was not only NOT in the stretch Hummer, she was a full participant in the brawl itself.

The bloody shirtless part is right however.

7. The time she was stopped for speeding, which she called “qualifying.” 

Sound bite: “I wasn’t speeding, I was qualifying.” 

8. The time she declared that gun-free zones are ‘stupid on steroids.’

Sound bite: “Maybe our kids could be defended against criminals on the spot if more Mama Grizzlies carried [guns]. And [the] Obama administration wants you ID’d for that? Well, then go ahead and carry a sign too. A sign that says ‘Yeah, I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.’” 

9. The time she launched a digital channel dedicated to herself. 

Sound bite: “Are you tired of the media filters? Well, I am! I always have been. So we’re going to do something about it. Together, we’ll go beyond the sound bites and cut through the media’s politically correct filter.”

Boy can you believe all of that happened in only one year?

Well I still think my favorite moment of Palin being Palin (And her family doing the same.), was the Throwdown at the Hoedown.

I mean if anything defines this lunatic and her inbred Wasillabilly family that was it. Cussing, fighting, attempting to hijack the media, it was all there for everybody to see, and hear, for themselves.

Gee, I can only imagine what next year will bring.


"Outfoxed: Rupert Murdoch’s War on Journalism" is now available online. If you haven't seen it...well there is really no excuse for having never seen it.


Courtesy of Raw Story:  

The film charts the rise of Fox News, outlining the marketing-based techniques that make the channel such “compelling” viewing — the “Fox News Alert,” the blurring of journalism and commentary, and the deceptive use of the chyron, i.e. the lower third of the viewing area on a typical television screen. 

In addition to that, the film also reviews Fox New’s coverage both of the 2000 presidential election and the run-up to the 2003 invasion of Iraq, demonstrating how the network successfully established the talking points used by those in the so-called “liberal media.”

Personally I have watched this documentary about three times now.

Typically I have to watch it incrementally because I get so pissed off I want to pick Sean Hannity up by his ankles and beat Roger Ailes to death with him.


Bishop of Shrewsbury calls the John Lennon song Imagine "heart chilling."



Courtesy of the Catholic Herald: 

The Bishop of Shrewsbury has described the John Lennon song Imagine as “heart-chilling” in a Christmas homily. 

Reflecting on this year’s Christmas adverts which focus on the First World War, Bishop Mark Davies will say in a homily on Christmas Day: “The events of Christmas 1914 give the lie to the lazily repeated assertion that ‘religion is the cause of wars’. John Lennon would give voice to this ill-founded belief in the lyrics of his song Imagine. This becomes a heart-chilling vision in which Lennon imagines a world with no hope of heaven and no fear of hell. And he adds, ‘no religion too’. Only then, he suggests will ‘all the people’ be ‘living life in peace.’” 

The bishop will continue: “Yet the fact is, the wars of the century past, bringing with them atrocities and destruction on a scale never seen before, were largely inspired by secularist and, indeed, openly anti-Christian ideologies. In reality, it is human sin which lies at the root cause of war. Conflicts, writes St James, arise within the human heart wherever ‘bitter jealousy and selfish ambition’ are found (James 3: 14). Tonight we declare that Christ came to ‘save us from our sins’, to enable us to give glory to God and to bring peace amongst men. Christ calls all who would follow Him to have, as we have just heard in St Paul’s words: ‘no ambition except to do good’ (Titus 2:14).”

That last part is complete bullshit. In fact most wars were either inspired by religious differences, ideological differences, or strategic power grabs.

And the word "sin" is a bullshit primitive definition to explain complicated human behaviors that too many people lack the intellect or patience to understand completley.

As for the John Lennon, well I will take his beautiful song about hope and peace over the Catholic church's doctrine of shame, oppression, and misogyny any day of the week.


For those on Fox News trying to convince us that the idea of separation of church and state is a recent invention, yeah not so much.


As you can see there is no date on the comic to tell us when it was printed, however a quick Google search of the cartoonist Watson Heston tells us that he died in 1905.

So that should provide insight into how long this debate has been raging.

Especially considering the fact that it was not until 1870 that all of the states at that time even had public schools.

If we are to continue to provide our students with a well rounded education job one should be keeping religion as far away from our schools as humanly possible.


Sarah Palin's ghostwriter finally got off her fat ass and wrote her something to say about Cuba.


The video starts off with these words:

"President Obama's recent decision to normalize relations with the oppressive communist regime in Cuba, it puts me in mind of how another president handled relations with the communists." 

And after that it is just blah, blah, Ronald Reagan, blah blah, cold war, blah blah, evil empire, blah blah.......Obama sucks.

It's almost Christmas and I have no intention of transcribing the entire seven minutes of this thing.

However the sycophants over at Breitbart were forced to transcribe a portion of her holiday babble so I will simply link to them and share some of it here for the mocking. (And don't forget every time you visit Breitbart.com an angel has its wings torn off. So think before you click.)

Let us begin: 

“I am so ashamed with what the Obama administration has done to Cuban people. I do not support it,” Palin, speaking in front of a lit candle, says in a video that will be seen on The Sarah Palin Channel. (Aww Sarah Palin is ashamed of the President. Well then you KNOW he must be doing something right.)“This Christmas eve, I intend to light a candle and put it in my window to show my solidarity with every brave Cuban fighting for freedom and every political dissident languishing in Castro’s prisons. 

“I encourage you to do the same. Let’s join together in this. Let’s show them that the light of freedom shall never be extinguished.”

Yes lighting candles. Such an effective method for overthrowing a government. 

(Actually the idea comes from a Reagan documentary that Palin pimps during this warm over serving of word salad.)

Palin contrasted Reagan’s “moral clarity” (She confused "moral clarity" with "ignorance about diplomacy.") during the Cold War against the Soviet Union with Obama’s recent appeasement on Cuba. She mentioned that Reagan knew that the Soviet Union’s economic model was “a total failure” but did not collapse only because the Soviets were able to manipulate Americans into propping it up with grain deals and technology exchanges. She blamed “naive diplomats” and “Wall Street greed” for combining to “prop up the most repressive regime in human history” that “would have crumbled so much sooner under the weight of its own incompetence if it were not for” the policies of appeasement. 

Reagan, Palin notes, had the “moral clarity” to call the Soviet Union an “evil empire” and declare that his strategy for the Cold War was simply, “we win, they lose.” (Yes and if Mikhail Gorbachev had not taken the initiative and reached out to Reagan then nothing would have changed on his watch. Reagan's so-called toughness did nothing except slow down the process by which the cold war ended.)

Palin urged viewers to contrast Reagan’s moral clarity with Obama’s decision to “spit in the face of every human rights activist in Cuba.” (Well according to Palin, the President has stopped shoving things down throats and is now spitting in the face. Is that progress?) She said Obama’s decision to reverse U.S. policy toward Cuba “enriched their oppressors and sanctioned their abuse.” (She does realize that we currently trade with a number of countries which have terrible reputations for oppressing human rights, doesn't she?) She said that “greedy crony capitalists are propping up a failing Communist regime” in Cuba, and Obama just gave the “Castro regime the hard currency and the economic boost to remain in power forever.” 

Palin said it is “ludicrous” to think that Cubans will enjoy democracy and human rights because corporations can sell products there. 

“Ask human rights activists in China how that’s working for them,” Palin said, noting that the Cuban government will pocket 92% of wages of their workers to empower the apparatus that controls them. 

She ultimately accused Obama of giving “away all of our leverage to fight for human rights” (And boy hasn't that leverage been working out well so far.) and betraying “the people who are courageously putting their lives on the line fighting for freedom.” She even said Obama was “spitting in the face of every human rights activist on the globe” before asking Americans to light candles to support the Cuban freedom fighters that the Obama administration betrayed.

 Palin also uses the President's middle name during the video which I am assuming she still considers an insult.

You know for fun I would like to ask Palin on video to point to where Cuba is on a map. Fifty bucks says she couldn't find it in ten tries.

Okay so after working on this for a couple of days, the best Palin's ghostwriter could do was to steal some tape from a Reagan documentary, string a bunch of words together that almost make Palin sound like she once read a book, and change the attack against the President from accusing him of "shoving things down our throats" to "spitting in the face" of human rights advocates.

Color me unimpressed.

But even worse than the actual words that the ghostwriter had Palin vomit forth, is the image that Palin presents in the video of a poorly bewigged mental patient, with too much lip gloss, the glow of a teleprompter reflected in her man glasses, and a hideous fur collared suit with shoulder pads left over from the eighties.

I mean is anybody even trying to make her look professional these days?

I think I probably spent more time typing this up just now, and trust me I went through it as quickly as I possibly could, then her team spent putting that whole video together.

I have half a mind to start covering Ted Cruz instead of wasting my time on Palin. I mean at least Cruz comes up with new crazy all the time instead of regurgitating the same old partially digested talking points over and over again.

You know I think it might be about time to have a glass of the Gryphen family's famous eggnog.

It's made from a recipe that my father came up with;  Six ounces of rum with three tablespoons of nog added to give it that holiday flavor. 

It doesn't really taste that good but typically I pass out part way through my second glass. So who really cares?


 

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