That soldier of misfortune in the "War on Christmas" Sarah Palin pimps her unsellable book from last year. Which now you can buy on Amazon for one penny. Update!

"Oh God, please buy this book. I have so many losers to support back at home."

Well it's that time of year again folks.

The kids are off for winter break, the tree is decorated and running up our electric bill, the holiday classics are on every channel, and Sarah Palin is bitching about the Atheists trying to murder the baby Jesus with a candy cane.

Having already been caught shaking her flat ass for a ride out to oblivion, Palin has now shifted her focus to selling some of those books that nobody seemed to want last year.

Toward that end Palin has created a few videos and posted them on her own Sarah Palin Channel, because of course THAT is where to go for that as yet untapped market. (Okay there might be a flaw in this plan.)

In this video Palin describes how great Christmas is, and what assholes Atheists are for trying to take it away from people, while also discussing the recipes contained within including moose chili (WTF?), blueberry pie, and of course the extremely complicated to prepare Rice Krispie treats.

Courtesy of Raw Story: 

Former half-term Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin, spoke of recipes and family holiday get-togethers while noting that her viewers shouldn’t let “a few angry atheists with attorneys” get in the way of celebrating the birth of Christ. 

“Oh, I am so excited for people to get to read this Christmas book, while protecting the heart of Christmas and not allowing the Scrooges out there to take Christ out of Christmas, or to erode any of the tradition we celebrate during the Christmas season,” she explained. “It’s called ‘Good Tidings and Great Joy: Protecting the Heart of Christmas’.” 

She continued to discuss “what we believe in at this time of year,” before returning, once again, to her book. 

“What we believe in is freedom of expressing our faith and what our beliefs are, not allowing just a few angry atheists with attorneys perhaps to tell us that we can’t celebrate the birth of Christ the way that we would like to,” she said. “And it’s not an in-your-face political lecture, it’s a fun book that incorporates the solution to the challenge that is the war on Christmas that we see taking place right now.” 

Palin went on to say that she believes the book will “hopefully will spark some inspiration in other people to allow them, no matter what faith anyone is, allow them some Christmas joy to spread.” 

She also promises that the book features her recipe for her moose chili (“I’m kind famous for my moose chili”) as well as rice krispie treats and blue-berry pies, saying her family has to “compete” with native Alaskan bears to harvest the berries first.

Raw Story goes on to point out that those who actually want to buy this ridiculous book can get a used one on Amazon for a penny.  (Still overpriced in my opinion.)

If you watch the video you will see a shot of Palin getting some frozen meat out of her dented freezer while holding a sleeping Trig, who suddenly comes to life and starts squirming after he realizes who is holding him.

The entire video has Palin using that fake syrupy voice of her's. But if you think that is bad then you have to see this one where she talks about sending John McCain a Christmas card.

Transcript courtesy of Wonkette:  

Yes, John McCain does get a Christmas card, and he gets a note of appreciation for recognizing that there was someone way up in the Last Frontier who had a desire to serve this country. I still appreciate John McCain for that, and I thank him for that. Yeah, John McCain’s on my Christmas card list, heck yeah. 

Okay did that sound really creepy to anybody else?

Wonkette features another video where Palin brags that the only thing she ever gets Todd for Christmas is a fifty dollar gas card and that it is enough to make him happy. (Oh yeah, Todd looks like a happy guy doesn't he?)

Damn I have to imagine that the idiots that actually paid the subscription fee for the Sarah Palin Channel are kicking themselves right about now.

Not only is there rarely any content, but when there is it is trying to sell them books that they already bought a long time ago.

I can hardly wait to find out how far she sinks in the Alexa ratings this next year.

Update: Apparently Palin also sent out a tweet yesterday giving the Duck Dynasty disphits a much more appropriate name.

The tweet has now been fixed, but not before those pesky liberals too the screen shot above.

The Sarah Palin Channel Thanksgiving message, brought to you on Facebook where people might actually see it, features unruly children and an attempted puppy homicide.

So Palin, wearing the same hooker shirt she wore in Louisiana, decided to send out a Thanksgiving message.

It was clearly recorded for the Sarah Palin Channel, as indicated by the logo at the bottom, but Palin must have wanted more than six people to see it so she stuck it on Facebook,

As you can see from the picture she has both Trig (Who you can see in that screen capture is in the process of choking that poor dog damn near to death.) and Tripp (Who I was under the impression was NOT supposed to be featured in any of Palin's propaganda anymore.) on the couch with her.

Later she calls over Piper and her friend McKinley to parrot what they have been told to be thankful for. (McKinley: "Military." Piper: "Family and military." Good job kids here's your cookie.)

At the end Palin claims she did not force the girls to say that, but we all know the drill.

I think the take way from watching this video, is that the team behind the Sarah Palin Channel has given up on ever producing any sort of professional footage and that Palin has literally NO control over the kids in her family. Or the dogs for that matter.

Well Sarah Palin is feeling ignored so it is time to trot out her favorite prop for a little attention.

First Palin links to this article on Brancy's blog about a man with Down syndrome who "beat the odds" and has now lived to reach 40 years old, which they claim is twice as long as these children are supposed to live.

That of course is incorrect as the life expectancy of a well cared for child with Down's is between 55 and 60 years old.

As for Trig's life expectancy? Well that is another matter entirely.

Palin then goes on to report this on her Facebook page:

I read it again yesterday while waiting for Trig to awaken after eye surgery. So groggy from deep sleep at the hands of a skilled anesthesiologist, our son's surgeon also waited and reassured. And he told me the most fascinating thing about the eyes of a child with Down syndrome. "Compare his eyes to a 'normal' child's. Get a magnifying glass. Look deep. Their eyes are captivating inside! They're different, they're colorful, they sparkle. Surely God made these eyes to reflect what heaven must be." 

If only we all could see into and through the eyes of the innocent! They're God's sons and daughters who may not meet man's standards of perfection but will certainly meet His. Their enduring childlike faith and their patience with the rest of us can teach us what is important. Maybe if we look with those eyes, what a wonderful world we will see.

 - Sarah Palin

You know the thing about Down syndrome children, or ALL children for that matter, is that their care cannot be left up to God. They actually need very involved parents to help them overcome obstacles and achieve their dreams, whatever those might be.

Palin keeps referring to Trig as "childlike" and "innocent" and that may be true right now, but someday he is not going to seem so much like a child, as he will a grumpy middle aged man who gets frustrated that simple things remain so hard for him, and that his life is so much different than that of his peers.

I do not know why Trig required eye surgery, though if I were to guess I would say it was probably to correct his strabismus (crossed eyes).

However it has seemed to me for quite some time that Trig has not been receiving the type of care that he requires as early as he requires it. So if Palin really wants Trig to live a long and full life, she needs to stop being so focused on her own needs as a public figure, and much more focused on the needs of the child that she decided, for whatever reason, to bring into her home.

Sarah Palin brags that Ted Cruz came to her house for dinner, and encourages people to get out and vote. Finally, something we agree on.

Courtesy of the Ted Cruz groupie's Facebook page:

In Alaska, even the moose help with "Get Out The Vote" efforts. This little guy has been door-knocking since summer! Even our friend Senator Ted Cruz got to see him in the yard this weekend when the Senator stopped by for a bowl of moose chili (I assured him he wasn't eating this adorable ungulate's kin!). 

All over the political spectrum it's so important we all exercise our right to vote. Our democracy is the envy of the world, and to protect it our country's bravest have sacrificed more than most of us will ever know. To honor their service, please vote.

 - Sarah Palin

First off let me say that in NONE of the coverage of Cruz's visit to Alaska to stump for Dan Sullivan, was Sarah Palin's name mentioned. 

However it is clear that Palin was not about to let this opportunity go by without serving Rafael Cruz her infamous moose slop, and giving him a tour of the part of the house that Todd is forced to live in.

Gee I wonder why Palin was not standing with Cruz and Romney while they were stumping for Dan Sullivan? You would think that they could not keep her away if they tried.

Or perhaps they could, and did.