Writing Sarah Palin satire is an exercise in futility, since she is essentially a walking talking parody of herself already.


Okay I feel like I need to address this since it is now getting a little out of hand.

The Daily Currant wrote a piece in which they attribute these words to Sarah Palin: 

“If I were Obama I’d put all 11 million of these folks on boats and send them back to Mexico,” she opined. “The liberal media says it’s impossible to deport that many people. But I say we can do it if we have enough ships. 

“Let’s commandeer all the cruise ships, all the fishing vessels and all the yachts those fat cat Obama donors own. And then let’s pack ‘em full of illegals and send these people on a one-way cruise to Mexico City. 

“The long voyage back across the Mexican Ocean should give them plenty of time to think about how they shouldn’t be coming here to America and jeopardizing our freedom and prosperity by breaking our laws.”

Now the Daily Currant suggests that she said this during a Fox interview, so  right off the bat most of you should know that is impossible since we tend to cover those interviews here at IM. And let's face it, we would have been all over that if it were true.

Secondly you should always be a little skeptical when you think "You know that's even too crazy for her." Because chances are that yes it is probably too crazy for her.

And third by now you should all know that there are sites like the Daily Currant and the Onion out there that brilliantly make up these stories for our entertainment, and that they should NOT be taken seriously.

In fact here is a list that you can refer to in the future to keep from being fooled again.

Now before any of you start to feel embarrassed that you were suckered let me assure you that it has happened to me before as well. And there are plenty of news outlets, like Fox and Breitbart, that still get punked with some frequency.

For this one in particular I received at least a dozen e-mails and comments excitedly pointing to the article. And that includes one from my daughter last night, which simply said "Did you hear what Sarah Palin said yesterday?"

Of course that could have been anything, but it turned out to be this article which all of her friends were buzzing about.

And that's really the point right? Getting buzz and fishing for clicks.

However it makes what I do all the more challenging. Because when I dig up an actual crazy fact about Sarah Palin it is immediately in competition for attention with all of these fake crazy "facts" about Sarah Palin.

So let's do us all a favor and try to double check sources before sharing some of this stuff on Facebook Twitter, or here at IM.

Let me end this by thanking you for your support, and the many legitimate links that you DO send my direction. It makes this job a whole lot easier as I certainly don't have enough time to scour the internet effectively on my own. 


The Onion jokingly describes TLC plans for replacing "Honey Boo Boo" but I think they are really on to something.


So I don't usually link to the Onion because when dealing with some of the things I write about you really have to struggle to define the line between reality and parody.

However yesterday I saw this amazing faux description of what the TLC producers should be doing in response to the loss of one of their biggest stars.

Take a look: 

Saying that he didn’t “give two shits” if they had to knock on the door of every trailer and halfway house in the country, TLC producer and programming director Mark Livingston reportedly told his staffers Friday that he expects to see a list of at least 100 fucked-up families on his desk by the end of the workday. “We’re up shit creek right now, so I need each one of you assholes rooting through every gutter in the goddamn Ozarks to find me a household of inbreds, addicts, or fat-as-fuck morons that we can put in primetime,” a visibly aggravated Livingston said to his staff following the cancellation of the network’s popular Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, stressing that the new families had better be “borderline brain-dead” and “messed up as all fuck.” “If they have 20 dipshit kids, that’s great. If they only have one greasy dimwit kid who can barely string a sentence together, that’ll work too. Hell, you get me some snarl-toothed family of backwoods idiots who all call their dad Papa Pig or some shit like that, and I’ll sign them immediately. Just find me some family of sewer people I can throw in front of the goddamn camera, got it?” At press time, Livingston was angrily telling his staffers that they could all find a new job wiping asses at the Disney Channel if they brought him one more suggestion for a morbidly obese teen mother.

Okay I'm sorry, I know they might think this is a joke but c'mon we all know who they are describing, right?

And it's not like they have not worked with them before, so they will not have to struggle to learn all of their bizarre names or anything.

And NOW they are even a better fit for TLC now that they have taken to crashing parties and attacking the hosts.

I mean come on, the scripts for the unscripted reality show almost write themselves.

One episode could be all about Track ripping off various articles of clothing before he gets his ass beat by a bunch of "little bitches,"

And another could focus on a highly intoxicated Bristol telling the TLC camera crew about being sexually assaulted by imaginary men, or possibly aliens, and them stealing her expensive accessories. As well as possibly probing her.

Another episode would feature Willow demonstrating her incredible expletive filled vocabulary. "Did you know there are like a hundred and ninety five different variations on saying 'fuck you' to somebody?"

And of course Sarah herself will yelling "Don't film that," and "Stop cussing Track," and of course "I'll buy the film from your camera."


Yep I think it is meant to be.


 

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